By: Jackie Owens
So ladies, I’m spilling the beans on myself—I want to identify what it truly means to be vain. I love make-up, fashion, and anything dealing with beauty. What I didn’t realize was how insecure I was with all these things.
It started off with a simple desire to want to wear make-up. I was excited about buying different lipsticks colors and make-up brands for the first time. I stayed thrifting for new looks because, “I just had to be beat.” It wasn’t until I got so consumed in it that God began to show me my insecurities.
Everyday I would apply make-up, but I was really wearing it just so someone could tell me how beautiful or fine I was. I recognized that even when people wouldn’t compliment me, I would run to the bathroom back to back, checking my make-up to see if it was messed up because I just knew I deserved a compliment for that particular look.
I would bash other people’s looks because I didn’t feel pretty enough, worthy enough, and glamorous enough in comparison with other women. I took everything I learned about fashion and make-up and became “ugly” with my attitude towards it. I couldn’t leave the house without make-up because I never wanted anyone to see my flaws—it all became vain. God had something else for me.
I went a year without make-up and learned that make-up doesn’t shape my identity; it’s the inward beauty God looks for. You can have on the best Mac make-up and the tightest jeans and still be ugly.
Beauty isn’t what we can dress up, it’s actually what you’re willing to expose about your true flaws, embracing them, and being okay with yourself. I’m going to leave you with something I asked myself: If nobody else in the world told me I was beautiful, bad, or looked good, would I truly be content?
If you find yourself doing the same thing I did, then you’re dealing with vanity. God can change that as He’s changing me. He can show you your true worth and value. Here’s a scripture that blessed me and I hope this helps you too. Ezekiel 16 (MSG) version.
Yours Truly,
Jacqueline
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